Freshers' week

Monday

Was so nerve-racking, but I had some reassurance as I've experienced uni before. I am so grateful to my Sister who showed me around, as my previous uni was very small and everything was very close together, but this uni's campuses are pretty scattered. I got my ID card made finally (once their "system"- a stupid webcam (!)) was working. I went to the first session and before it I began fixing my scarf (the underscarf was too tight) so when I got to the session most people were sat down. So I didnt get a chance to say Hi to people. First impressions: there were loads (I mean loads) of boys! And most of the girls were either international, or that "fake" type, no-one seemed approachable enough. I sat next to a group of girls who already seemed to know each other and were talking about parties and their halls etc (accommodation). The session was rather boring, but it was funny at times, and the head of year seemed so inspiring, congratulating us for choosing Economics. After the session, I saw a girl a year younger than me I knew from high school so I said Hi and found out she is on the same course (in that session there were 3/4 different types of economics courses together).

I learnt my way around, roughly, and where to get the buses from etc- which I already sorta knew. I learnt where the prayer room is (which was so peaceful Hamdulillah). I was taking in slowly all the faces on my course but was disappointed I didn't have one new name yet. At the end of the day, I was prety exhausted! I didn't realise how much walking around there would be and I wasn't prepared for it. As I said, my last uni's buildings were all close together.

The main emphasis for freshers week seemed to be on going to clubs and getting wasted etc which was a little disheartening. I knew this happened, but in my last uni there was like one club so only two people handing out leaflets. This uni is much bigger and there are loads of clubs and the whole street was lined with half-naked girls handing out leaflets for club promotions. "Would you like to go to the silent disco tonight?" one asked me as I stood there in my pink and gold hijab. "Erm, what do you think??"  I thought to myself. So much fitnah and temptation, I thought, Astaghfirullah. I can kinda understand why many Muslims do get caught up in the partying scene.

Tuesday

I was so exhausted from the night before, and I stayed up late to watch Britain's next top model (tut) that I just about got ready on time for the 10 o clock session. The night before, something occurred to me. Perhaps I'm not on the right course. My future ambition inshaAllah is to be an entrepeneur and set up my own business, and Im really itching and fighting the urge to not set up one right now (as my parents think it will distract me from studies). So I had a look at the business courses again on the uni's website and came across one called Business Enterprise. It stood out to me as you can do placements, and all the units are specifically catered for people who wish to set up their own business. I felt stupid for not looking at this course before and finding out about it, but I knew it had happened for a reason. I went earlier than the session and went to talk to my tutor. I explained that I thought my current course was too theoretical to which she said all degrees are like that and if you need something more practical, uni isnt for you and you should do a vocational course. Bill Gates or Richard Branson don't have degrees, she said. I told her I felt stupid for not researching into what course I wanted to do, but that I was thinking about transferring to the Enterprise course. She said it's nothing to do with her and I should phone up admissions. I told her that I'd done a year of science at a different uni, and then she said something that really hit home: it sounds like you have no clue what you want to do and you better make up your mind soon as this is your life and you'll regret it if you made the wrong choice now. She told me to have a good think about it and let her know what happens.

And then it hit me: I've spent too many years trying to please other people (parents!) and it's time I began making my own choices. I have such a problem trying to decide what to do with my life as everyone always tells me what to do. So I explained this to my parents and they are a bit sceptical and wary, but said it's up to me at the end of the day.

When I finally got through to the Admissions helpline, I had to send an e-mail confirming I want to transfer and they'll look at my qualifications and see if there are any places left on the other course. I really hope there is a place for me, inshaAllah. I'm impatiently waiting for their reply. I know everything will turn out for the best.