Beauty and the geek: make-up and me

So I know in my last time I promised to blog more often, and told you I had so much to blog about. I do- but I'm struggling to find the time! Anyway, as promised, here is a post I have been itching to write.

*                                    *                                 *                                        *

Growing up, in my teenage years, I had the occasional spot but I had pretty good skin. My Mum always warned against me wearing make-up as she started wearing it when she was young, and thought it was the reason her skin got ruined. A few (not many) girls in high school were interested in make up, but I wasn't really. I was a geek/nerd/swot- whatever you want to call it, and we were into books and Pythagoras' theorem, not MAC lipsticks.

My Dad always used to say that the words "make up" imply the fact that cosmetics are used to make up for what you lack. He woud always remind me that beauty needs no armour. He also used to mention a hadith (which I have not found a reference for) that says that the Angels curse unmarried girls who leave the house which perfume and make-up on- especially make-up that's visible e.g. bright eye shadow. So naturally, I wasn't interested in make-up.

Eventually, my elder sister started getting into make-up. So during the first year of high school, I used to use a bit of concealer. It was the wrong shade, but I just liked the way it made your whole face look an even colour, and conceal the redness of spots. I only used to apply a bit, so it wasn't obvious at all.

The concealer would wear off quickly and wouldn't last very long, so I was advised to buy some foundation, powder and another concealer- all of the right shade. So I bought some. It wasn't expensive, it was of the "17" range by Boot's. So during the second year of college, I was now wearing concealer, then foundation, and then powder to "fix" this all in place. My Mum said that because of the shades I bought, and the paleness of my skin, I looked a bit ghost-like and needed some colour on my cheeks. It was then that I started to wear blusher too. I could never do it myself- I ended up looking like a clown, so my Mum always did it for me.

It was during this time that I was going through quite a rough patch- I had just been diagnosed with hypothyroidism, barely passed my AS levels, I was denied being allowed to apply for medical school, so many things were going on. I realise now that I was hiding my true emotions and feelings behind this mask of make-up. I didn't want people to know what was really going on, and I did not want to talk about it. I became really recluse and didn't go out with friends anymore. I also really hated my body at that time. I was pretty big, and I thought to myself, well if I can make my face look beautiful- why not? That way, I could still feel pretty, even it was just my face that I felt was pretty.

I was also heavily addicted to facebook, and had a camera that would point out every spot, every wrinkle, every bag, and so I had to be made-up everyday as I used to take a lot of pictures and put them on fb, and there was no way I was putting up a picture that made me look horrible. It was about artificial beauty. 

This carried on to the point where even if I was going to the corner shop, or for food shopping at good-old Morrison's with my Mum, I had all this make-up on. I dreaded the thought of leaving the house without make-up on: what if people saw what I really looked like? What if people saw my hideous bags and spots underneath?

I don't really know what the turning point was, but, I think, out of laziness, I stopped wearing make-up at all. I just couldn't be bothered with the time it all took to apply it, and to take it off. So when I started university in 2009, I just didn't wear make-up. It may have been aided by the fact that I moved out and used to get up at 8:55 for a 9am lecture- so putting make-up on was out of the question!

Even now, I still don't wear make-up to uni, even though pretty much every girl does. I do feel like the odd-one out, but I don't feel I need it anymore. I do feel that most girls hide behind this mask of make-up, and they'd die should anyone see them one without it. I mean, the stats are quite shocking.

I sometimes wear it, for special occasions (weddings), but that's about it. I have thought about wearing it again, just a little bit, but I don't know how I'd fit it in with my lifestyle of going to the gym everyday, I'd have to keep taking it off and re-applying it. Plus I think it's kinda impractical for doing wudhu- you'll either wash it off or the water won't get through to your skin in which case you haven't done proper wudhu.

But in this plastic-fantastic society, I can't help but think what is the purpose of make-up? The cosmetic industry is worth billions- but ladies, are we enhancing our beauty or covering up our true selves?

All pictures via weheartit.com